You Never Know What You Will Find.

We adopted Trey and Trentyn with the understanding that they would have needs but we didn’t know to what extent. From the files we received from our adoption agency we were lead to believe they had excellent eye sight, excellent teeth, and good health.  As we all know, you can’t believe everything you read. Trey and Trentyn needed glasses, major dental work, and follow-up health visits.

Trentyn and Trey with Dad after eye exam. Eye glasses ordered!

Trey having teeth repaired.

Trentyn in dentist chair.

Along with these needs, we had another need we had to take care of last week and that was a computer. Trey and Trentyn had a helper at school assisting them with Earth Science, American History, and English, but that came to an end when she had her baby on February 1^st. Now, the boys were going to have to work on their coursework on their own. As we talked with the boys, they wanted a computer that would allow for them to use Google translate. With this request before us, I went to work checking the classifieds, Craig’s List, auctions sites and pawn shops. I located a laptop at a pawn shop in Saint Paul, MN that fit the need. I purchased the laptop, brought it home, and immediately went to cleaning the outside of the laptop. After cleaning the outside to my satisfaction, I turned on the laptop and started to browse through files that had been left on the laptop. I open Windows Live and was met by many young girls with little or no clothing. I immediately shut down Windows Live and went to a folder labeled videos.  After a minute in this file, I knew I had to thoroughly go through this laptop. This individual had a proclivity to porn.  I located pictures, videos, and I also located this individual’s tax return.  I was repulsed. The Bible tells us to be sexually pure. This is why Jesus even tells us to guard our minds.  Viewing this kind of material opens the mind up to sin. But then, someone may say that they view pornography as an art form and that it is beautiful.  But this is nothing more than an attempt to justify sin.

Today, if a person desires to look at naked men and women doing immoral things, it is very easy to do so. With sin rapid in our world and the desire for men and woman to feed their sexual appetites I would not be surprised if more people watch porn than there are people who watch sports. A mere touch of a button can access this filth.

How many times have you started out with good intentions, only to be met with evil and darkness? We must abstain from every form of evil (I Thess. 5:22). James 4: 7-8 ⁷ So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. ⁸ Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.

I’ve finished cleaning the laptop inside and out but this incidence is a reminder that I must guard my heart with all diligence (Proverbs 4:23).

What we've been doing

I’ve been lacking on the blog posts lately. There just doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to get everything done, and posting pictures and blogging seems to fall at the bottom of the list. But, I know how much our friends and family like to check to see new pictures or a new blog, so here is a quick recap of our past few months.

Trentyn and Trey's first day of school 10/24/11

Trey and Trentyn's first attempt at carving a pumpkin

Thanksgiving with my family

The boys decorating our 12ft artificial Christmas tree

Trey and Trentyn making cutout sugar cookies with Grandma Sarah

Trey and Trentyn decorating sugar cookies with aunts, uncles, and cousins in MI.

Looking for a "real" Christmas tree in MI.

Grandpa Rex  and Grandma Sarah's  Christmas tree.

Trey and Trentyn playing in WI snow.

Christmas Day with all our sons together!

Trey and cousin Jordan celebrating their 14th birthday.

At Meijer Sculpture Garden- Grandma Sarah, Trey, Trentyn, Grandma Rogers and Grandpa Rogers.

Troy helping Trey play his new trombone.

Trentyn with his piano teacher.

As you can see, we have been busy with the boys activities, celebrating holidays, Trey's birthday, and traveling to MI. Another activity that we are consumed in much of the time is homework. We know that as English becomes easier, so will the homework.

We are thankful that Trey and Trentyn are in our home. They are delights!

Remembering

As I reflect on the past year, one thing I know for sure is that Terry’s dad, Melvin is not here to see his grandsons, Trey and Trentyn. Tomorrow, January 23, marks the 15^th year anniversary of his death. 

What I know is that death is not easy. Sometimes it comes creeping in through my pores without warning. I wasn’t ready to see my father-in-law die. He was good to me and I liked him a lot. His death has been followed by the death of my mother, my brother, and my dad. All of whom, will never see our adopted sons, Trey or Trentyn. 

I look at tomorrow with sadness and gladness. I have sadness in the fact that Trey and Trentyn will not know their Grandpa Melvin, but gladness that Melvin is in heaven and suffers no more ailments or pain.

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving is a favorite holiday for many Americans. They love the food, they love being with family for hours with nothing on the agenda other than carving fowl, enjoying each other's company, watching football, remembering past times, and sleeping. But for me, Thanksgiving has taken on a whole new emotion.

There isn't a day—Thanksgiving or not—where I don't look at my boys and marvel at how we have been brought together. We were so clearly meant to have these boys in our lives; we were so clearly meant to learn from them. And for the blessing of having them in our life, I am ever grateful and humbly thankful. That gratitude is so clear, especially on Thanksgiving.

But I can't just sit in this joy, in this gratitude, truth be told. Because while I reflect on what gifts our lives have been given, I am ever aware of the circumstances that have made these gifts possible, and so my gratitude is always a bit bittersweet.  Think of a mother who has given birth, and the challenges she must have faced in her life to give her son up.  I’ve had several people tell me, “Your sons are lucky to have you.”  I pause and tell them, “It wasn't luck that brought us together.” I know that without a doubt. I know that our sons coming into our lives, our coming into their lives is part of God’s plan. He saved these boys just for us and we give thanks!

On November 24th, my family will bow its head around the table and give thanks. And, yet, my heart and mind will not be in America. My heart and mind will be in China; thinking of the women who gave us our sons.

China Impressions

Before we traveled to China we had preconceived ideas of  what we may encounter. I want to start by emphasizing that  we came home with a sincere respect for China and the  people there. For those who have not done much traveling in Asian countries, there are certainly surprises to be found  in China. At times China seemed like another planet, with such completely different language and customs. You may, for the first time in your life, know what it feels like to be a minority. You will be frustrated by your inability to communicate. You will see polluted water, smell things you'd rather not and eat things that you can't be sure what they are! Be flexible, smile a  lot, talk softly, and be nice. You will be rewarded. Busy sidewalks of Beijing The Great Wall of China Stir-fried nuts of some kind Water boy  We had taken with us some negative impressions of China  that we had gotten from growing up in the communist phobic  1950's, and even from the adoption community and adoption agency. Our experience was very positive. Everywhere we  went the people were wonderful or mostly wonderful, the food  was interesting and we never felt uncomfortable or unsafe.  If the opportunity to go back ever presents itself, I would not be opposed to going.

The Trip to China

 September 15, 2011, was travel day and a long day it was. Terry, myself, and Grandma Sarah were driven to the Minneapolis Airport, by our son, Tyler. We were to fly from Minneapolis to Chicago and Chicago to Beijing.

  

We landed at the Beijing Airport on September 16th and needed to locate our guide in rows and rows of people waiting to connect with someone at the airport. What an experience! After a bit of looking and pushing my way back through the airport receiving line, I spotted our guide's sign and guide. We quickly exchanged pleasantries and headed to meet our driver. We located our driver, Mr. Lee, loaded the van, and proceeded to the Holiday Inn in Beijing, China. This was to be our home for the adoption process in Beijing. At the hotel, we met George, who would guide us through the adoption process and was our translator. George gave us some instructions and told us we would meet September 18 @8:30 AM in hotel lobby and depart for Orphanage 2. Then after Orphanage 2 we would go to Orphanage 1.  We allowed ourselves a day of relaxing and sightseeing in and around Beijing before we started on our way to meet our sons. We spent the first day walking around town, taking in the new sights and sounds.  For a city of the size and population of Beijing, we found it very friendly and easy to get around. Thanks to the abundance of bicycles and the resulting smaller numbers of cars, we found the traffic and street noise to be quite bearable.

Sunday, September 18, 2011 we were off to get our boys. We went to Orphanage 2 first.  Upon arrival to Orphanage 2, we noticed it was surrounded by razor wire and a guard. Our guide talked to the guard and we were cleared to go in. Upon arrival, we were met by the Orphanage Director, a very friendly man. And very quickly, our son Trentyn was in front of us smiling. 

We were hurried to a room for much paperwork and exchange of gifts. We met Trentyn’s nanny, who showed much care. We took photos and we were on our way to Orphanage 1. When traveling to Orphanage 1, our guide, George, received a call, letting us know we could not pick up Trey until the Director was there. That meant we needed to slow up and take a breather. We decided to stop for lunch. George ordered lunch for us and we managed to eat a bit with the only two forks they had in the whole big restaurant. Trentyn did not eat much. I’m sure he was nervous. After lunch we headed to Orphanage 1. 

We were met by the Director and hurried into a room. We filled out paperwork and answered many questions before Trey came into the room. Trey was very sad and his eyes were filled with tears. We tried to console Trey and let him know everything is going to be OK. We are family.  We finished with pictures and headed back to the hotel. Just like that we were parents to teenagers,  again.

For the five days in Beijing, we worked with the local government officials to legally adopt Trey and Trentyn in China and obtain Chinese passports for them.  Although seemingly slow at times, the officials were friendly, charming and helpful throughout the process. After 13 months of paperwork and close scrutiny at home, the Chinese "interviews" seemed cursory and simple. We took simple gifts for the officials and guides which they did not open in our presence.

 We flew to Guangzhou for the last four days to run our last gauntlet, the exit interview and visa from the American embassy. We stayed at the five star Garden Hotel. The accommodations were beyond adequate! Guangzhou is bigger, hotter and more westernized than we had seen so far. The area around the Garden Hotel is very clean and upscale.

The services at the hotels were outstanding. Before you could think of what you needed someone was usually there with it and you didn’t have to open the door yourself or push your own elevator button. It was great to have that since we were focusing on the boys. During our free time we would go sightseeing, venture to stores and shop, swim, eat, or nap.  Through all of this, the boys did great!

We boarded our flight for home a couple of days later than anticipated. Our flight home was delayed by typhoon Nesat. We were driven from Guanghzou to Hong Kong by a hired driver. Our drive to the airport was slowed by the border check in Shenzhen and Hong Kong. This took and hour due to October 1, National Day for China. The National Day is celebrated throughout mainland China, Hong Kong, and Macau  and it is at this time many Chinese travel. Once through the check point we were on our way and quickly arrived at the Hong Kong Airport.  The driver dropped us off curbside and showed us were to go. Here we had to weave through the maze of yet another busy airport and check in system.  We found our way to our gate and couldn’t wait to board the 747 for America! We arrived in Chicago, made it through customs, then on to immigration, checked the luggage again, and off to our gate. By now, we were tiring.  We were met at the airport by Kurt, my brother-in-law, and a truck to haul us home.  We stopped in Ellsworth for dinner at Dairy Queen. American food tasted good.

We have been home for several weeks and settling in as a family. Trey and Trentyn go to public school and are working hard to learn English. The boys have come a long way in a few shorts weeks and are no longer needing rice on a daily basis. Trey has a strong mechanical aptitude and Trey enjoys drawing and painting. They are good boys, with a desire to learn. We have a desire for Trey and Trentyn, and that is that they come to a saving faith in Christ Jesus.